Free Range

The folks at the Hash House Harriers (no, it has nothing to do with that kind of hash) will be thrilled to hear this news. Though I’m not sure the HHH know anything about moderation.

To use a cliche, it feels like slipping on an old pair of comfortable shoes — ones you haven’t worn a while, but the contours of which still feel so familar. I still remember my way around, mostly, though my subway commute technique (where to stand on the platform, and such) could use some fine tuning. I still remember how to keep warm in the biting cold wind. I have found a reasonably good, reasonably-priced place to get breakfast. I’ve even decided what to get for my default breakfast — a breakthrough in a town with so much choice! Even better, the short-order cook at the place already recognizes me and my default order.

It’s funny the things that make me feel at home in NYC. Here are some tips.

On Subway Commuting:

• Consider where you’re going, when you decide where to stand on the platform. If you’re going, say, to 17th Street, and heading uptown, stand at the end of the platform which lets you get on the front of the train. That way, when you get out at 14th Street, you’re already part of the way up the block before you even get above ground. (Warning: this only works when the destination stop has multiple exits.)
  
• In the same vein, pay attention to North, South, East and West signs when you’re headed up to street level. It’s often easier to “cross the street” underground. This helps you ensure you’re in the right place when you emerge, and can take off walking toward your goal immediately, without having to wait for a traffic light to change.
  
• On the train, watch people’s body language as you approach a stop, and if it looks like a sitting person is about to get up and off, try to maneuver yourself into position to slide in. Body language is generally super important in any kind of crowded situation in NYC.
  

On Ordering Breakfast:

• The “standard” coffee order in New York comes with sugar and milk. So if you just ask for coffee, that’s what you’re getting. Even ordering it “black” will result in a sugared coffee. So, for me, I have to say “black, no sugar” to get what I need.
  
• Practically any corner deli in the city can cook you almost anything, to order, quickly — and fairly cheaply. So, hang back until you know what you want, but then don’t be afraid to ask for your exact preference. You want three egg whites with provolone on dry whole wheat toast? You won’t see it on the menu exactly that way, but you can get it. Oatmeal made with skim milk topped with walnuts and dried cranberries? It’s yours.
  
• Eventually, if you keep ordering the same thing at the same place, you won’t even have to order anymore. They’ll remember you, and your preferences, and you’re all set.
  
• New Yorkers are big on “the system” and every breakfast place (or deli, or whatever) usually has an optimal navigational route. There’s nothing worse (ok, there are plenty of things that are worse) than getting caught up in the line, and being prompted to order with NYC-style rapidity, when you’re quite not ready with your order. This city is all about knowing what you want… and chasing after it.
  

Very cool.

Via kraneland.

In Germany, it’s still OK to smoke in the workplace so long as your business is under a certain size. And now, Reuters reports, the owner of a 10-person IT firm has fired 3 of his staffers who don’t take advantage of this privilege — because they lobbied for a smoke-free workplace.

“I can’t be bothered with trouble-makers,” Thomas was quoted saying. “We’re on the phone all the time and it’s just easier to work while smoking. Everyone picks on smokers these days. It’s time for revenge. I’m only going to hire smokers from now on.”

Alice Bradley of Finslippy conducted a little experiment this week that’s had hilarious results. She asked readers of her site to submit their worst parenting stories, and she presented the “winners” yesterday. If you’re a parent, and perhaps even if you aren’t, this is one of those blog posts that will crack you up and horrify you, all at once.